Ephesians Chapter 5: Gender Roles Submission in Marriage Polygamy


 1: Be ye therefore imitators of God as beloved off-spring 2: And walk in love as Christ also has loved us and has given himself for us an offering and a sacrifice to God for a sweet-smelling savor [1] 3: But porneia and all uncleanness or covetousness let it not be once named among you as becomes saints 4: Neither filthiness nor foolish talking nor jesting (malicious witticism) which are not fitting but rather giving of thanks 5: For this you know that no pornos nor unclean nor covetous who are idolaters have any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God 6: Let none deceive you with vain words for because of these things is visited the wrath of God upon the children of disbelief 7: Become not therefore assembled [and] joint-partakers with them 8: For you were once darkness but now are you light in the Lord walk as children of light 9: For the fruit of the Spirit is in all goodness and righteousness and truth [2] 10: Proving what is acceptable to the Lord 11: And have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness but rather reprove elegchō [expose/admonish] them[3] 12: For it is a shame even to speak of those things which are done by them in secret 13: But all things that are exposed are made visible by the light for whatever produces visibility is light 14: Wherefore he says Awake you that sleep (heed the drawing and conviction of the Lord) and arise from the dead (call on God to save you!) and Christ shall give you light (show you how to walk in his ways) Thy WORD is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path  15: See then that you walk thoughtfully (and prudently) not as fools but as wise 16: Redeeming the time because the days are evil 17: Wherefore be not unwise but understanding what the will of the Lord is 18: And be not drunk with wine wherein is excess but be filled with the Spirit 19: Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs singing and making melody in your hearts to the Lord [4] 20: Thanking always over all [in the] name of our Master Jesus Christ the God and Father Berry  [Isaiah 9:6] Scriveners TR 1894 21: Yielding to [being supportive of] one another in the fear of God 22: Wives yield to [be supportive of] your own husbands [5] as unto the Lord 23: For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the Church [6] and He [Christ] is the Savior of the Body [of Christ] 24: Therefore as the Church yields to Christ so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything 25: Husbands love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it 26: That He might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word 27: That He might present it to Himself Godhead a glorious church not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing but that it should be holy and without blemish [7]  28: So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies They who love their wives love themselves 29: For no one ever yet hated their own flesh but nourishes and cherishes it [their own flesh] just as also the Lord the church 30: For we are members of His body of His flesh and of His bones 31: For this cause shall a man leave father [and] mother and follow hard after [be joined like cement glue] to  [8] his woman and they two shall be one flesh[9] 32: This is a great mystery but I speak concerning Christ and the Church[10] 33: Nevertheless [even though you cannot fully comprehend this] so love everyone after the manner [of Christ and] particularly love your wives even as yourselves and wives to [11] fear phobetai [12] husbands


[1] (Ephesians 5:2) Jesus gave his life for a lost and unbelieving world. This was done out of love, because God is love. Jesus is the very substance and embodiment of love. Yet, a brief history of so-called “Christian” response to disagreement on doctrine and differences of opinion, is filled with horrific violence never advocated by Jesus.

Our Savior said our fruits would reveal who we are. Shameful accusations against historical “Christian” persecutors, are all too often true, rightfully producing animus in the hearts of those who confuse wicked religious bigots with true followers of Christ, who never advocated conversion by compulsion: e.g.,   http://www.heretication.info/_heretics.html This should be a matter of reflection and repentance for every believer who follows any person or doctrine that has a testimony of abusing the name of Christ by imprisoning, torturing, and killing those who disagree[d] with them. Jesus said, “By this all shall know you are my disciples that you have love one towards another John 13:35.”

[2] Jesus said, “You shall know them by their fruit.” This is the biblical standard by we judge all things. The Bible says do not condemn, but the Bible also says judge all things by the Word of God. Christians must be mature, and learn to discern between the biblical and the unbiblical. One of the tools for discernment, given by Christ himself, was fruit. The apostle reinforces that truth to the believers at Ephesus, in reminding them that the fruit of the Spirit causes no one to become callous or cruel, but more like Jesus himself, who embodies love and is the TRUTH. Jesus, is our example of truth, goodness, and righteousness. Our fruit should be like his. Only God can condemn, but, using the standard of His WORD, God’s people are commanded to judge.

[3] Here, again, is the biblical concept of discernment (judging) and reproving. Christians are commanded to reprove, rebuke, and exhort. How can the unfruitful works of darkness be reproved, if they are not first judged to be so? And what form should reproofs take? On the subject of “reproving,” where, in the example of Christ, can the example of persecution be found? Jesus said some hard things in his rebukes to the religious leaders of his day, but when his disciples wanted to call fire down from heaven and destroy itinerant preachers of Messiah, Jesus said, No! Yet, for millennia, Christians have been persecuted by those calling themselves Christians. Jesus said, “By their fruits you shall know them.”

[4] Ephesians 5:19 is used by some to ban musical instruments from church services. They claim it is because instruments are not mentioned in this verse. This is an unwarranted interpretation, an example of failing to rightly discern the Word of God. God’s people are commanded, in the psalms, to praise him using all manner of musical instruments. Satan hates this, because praise stops the enemy. Yet some assume God changed his mind on the matter of praise simply because instruments are not mentioned in Ephesians. This is an unwarranted assumption. The verse is instructing on what to do, not on what not to do.

[5] Dr. Sue Hyatt writes that the word “submit” should have been translated as “support,” “In the context of biblical relationships between men and women, the best meaning of hypotasso is “to identify with or support.”

This writer agrees. Within biblical Christianity no military hierarchies can be found. Secular, military-like, applications of the Greek word, hypotasso, have no place in the living dynamics of the love relationship between our Creator and his people nor should it between co-workers in Christ or between husbands and wives.

It is erroneous to assign a biblical definition of “compliance” to the word hypotasso in New Testament non-military relationships. All believers are commanded to hypotasso one another. We see this in Ephesians 5:21 and 1 Peter 5:5 (the latter is found in all Koine Greek texts, over 5000 of which still exist today). In biblical usage, the word hypotasso is not hierarchical. It has nothing to do with being subordinate to, secondary to, or subject to. It must be applied in the sense of preferring one another over ourselves.    

Translator supplements add to the impression that the word is hierarchical when it is not. In Ephesians chapter five, see verses :21-22, where the word, “yourselves” (as in submit yourselves) is an English translator supplement that casts a hierarchical shadow over the passage, when there is no underlying Greek to support it.

As previously stated translating hypotasso as the word “submit” or the phrase “be subject to” gives rise to gender-biased-English-translation-theology, bluntly put…false doctrine. The word “yourselves” is not found in verses :21-22. There is no corresponding Greek to support it.

Semantics matter. Language influences opinion. The translator supplements of “yourselves” [in verses :21-22] add a non-existent emphatic and hierarchical flavor to the passage. It is an incorrect translation. As there is no corresponding Greek to justify the translator supplements of the emphatic “yourselves” in either verse, the words should be eliminated.

“Yielding one to another (being supportive one of the other) in the fear of God” is sufficient for understanding. The word, hypotasso, means the same for both husbands and wives. Hypotasso is used in 1 Peter 5:5 (Koine Greek/Received Text), where all believers are commanded to yield to and be supportive of one another. Given that all believers are commanded to prefer others before themselves, the Greek word, hypotasso, when applied to non-military relationships (marriage is certainly a non-military relationship), should not be translated using hierarchical terms such as “submit” or “be subject to.”

[6] Verses 28-29 explain what Paul meant when he wrote this. 1 Corinthians 11:3 and Ephesians 4:15-16 show that Christ “as head” loves and nourishes the Church, which is his Bride. Paul may even have been addressing the issue of domestic violence and abuse, which was prevalent among Jews and gentiles and certainly would have carried over into the early Church as well. The Headship of Christ as Chief Cornerstone (Head of the Corner) is a direct reference to his function as The Capstone of the Church. There is only one capstone in the only building that has one, so the husband is not referred to, here, as the chief cornerstone in a marriage.

Jesus’ function as the head is described in Ephesians 4:15-16, which describes a human body using a building metaphor. In this passage the head is portrayed as a capstone. Jesus, as the Chief Cornerstone is building, edifying, and unifying the body. There is no mention in this passage of ruling, but at any rate, husbands cannot do what Christ did and continues doing in the building of his Body:

“But speaking the truth in love may grow up into him in all things which is the head even Christ from whom the whole body fitly joined together (“Fitly joined together” is a building metaphor) and compacted by that which every joint supplies according to the effectual working in the measure of every part making increase of the body unto the edifying of itself in love.”

Among humans, only Jesus has headship. This passage bears witness to the fact that Christ’s headship has to do with the building, edifying, and unifying of the his out-called Body, which he called the “Out-Called.”

Ephesians 5:29 tells us that Christ’s Headship also includes the nourishment of the his Body, the Out-Called.

Christ as the kephale of the corner (the capstone) is the only connection between the rest of the building/Bride/Out-Called and the Godhead. And although there are many angles (corner stones) within the Body of Christ, there is only one Head of the Corner (capstone). Husband’s are not capstones. That is why Jesus said, “I am the [only] way the truth and the [only] life no one comes to the Father but by me.”

[7] This verse cannot be used as a basis for male headship trinity marriage teaching, or as a command for complementarian husbands and wives to engage in a cosmic role-play portraying god-husband and church-wife. The Out-Called is sanctified by Christ and His redeeming work on the cross, His death, His burial, and His resurrection, His triumph over death.

Wives cannot be made clean and set apart by husbands who cannot redeem. Husbands will not present their wives to God at the judgment. The “He” in verses 26 and 27 refers to Jesus and not to husbands. The “Himself” referenced in verse 26, is a reference to the eternal Godhead, because Jesus is God. Jesus is the God of the Burning Bush: Beloved Son Eternal Father.

1 Corinthians 7:4,14 refutes the redeemer husband fallacy by saying that the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife else their children would be unclean. That verse remains a puzzle to some. It also says the wife has equal authority over the husband’s body. In Christ, according to Galatians 3:29, there is equality and autonomy between all races and both sexes.

[8] Ephesians 5:30 is a quote from Genesis 2:24 and is directed to men. Upon marriage, in ancient times, women left their parent’s homes and typically went to live in the homes of their husband’s parents. This left the bride vulnerable to abuse from possibly hostile inlaws and possible abusive husband, with no natural protectors in the form of father or brother[s]. This arrangement is the exact opposite of the command in Genesis for the man to leave his parents and be joined like cement glue to his wife. The old English word, “cleave,” and the modern English “cling” are not strong enough to convey the strength of the voluntary bond a man must have with his wife.

Besides equality with no hierarchical gender roles, the Hebrew and Greek words (Strong’s H1692 and G4347) translated as “cleave to” or “cling to” require a man to follow hard after and move in sync together with his wife. This does not line up with either traditional-role-religion or complementarian male-headship, which teaches that men must always lead and women always follow. Additionally, the Genesis command was clear that God’s way was monogamy, which was not obeyed up to New Testament times, when polygamous men were disqualified from Christian leadership.  

[9] In his foreknowledge and providence, our Creator commanded all new husbands to separate themselves from their nuclear families and follow hard after [attach themselves like cement glue] to their wives. If they chose to live in a parental home, after their marriage, it was not to be with the husband’s family. But history records that from the Fall onward, this command has been generally disregarded. The command for a man to leave his nuclear family and follow hard after his wife would have served as a natural safe-guard for women against marital abuse and violence, as her family would have served as natural protectors.

As a side note: Obedience to leaving the husband's parents and sticking like cement glue to the wife, would have also protected against the practice of polygamy, which is against God's command for one husband to have only one wife. Some have defended the practice of polygamy claiming it is a benefit to women and cite disparity in numbers of male to female populations. For the most part smaller male populations could be attributed to war and other testosterone driven violence and adventure. Much early violence had to do with the stealing of women from enemy tribes. If, in the beginning, humanity had not fallen [through sin], these things would not have served to reduce the male population. There would likely have been a much greater balance between female to male ratios.

[10] As the apostle stated, the relationship between Christ and His Church is a great mystery. It is something the finite mind cannot begin to fathom. Since all our righteousness [the very best we can do] is as menstruous rags to an infinitely Holy God, complementarian efforts at cosmic role play between god-husband and church-wife is a useless and misguided attempt to “flesh out” something humans are not capable understanding, much less of doing.

[11] In Ephesians 5:33, Gender-biased-translator-supplements add an emphatic flavor to translations that favor male-headship but is not present in the texts. The text simply reads “…and wives to fear husbands.” Here are examples of misleading English-translation-theology that add a non-existent emphatic flavor to the the verse: …the wife see that she…KJV; …the wife must… NIV; …the wife must see to it that…NASB. None of these phrases exist in the Greek texts. The apostle was not commanding wives to be reverent to husbands. He was telling them to have a healthy fear of them.   

[12] In Ephesians 5:33, the Greek word translated as reverence or respect is phobeō or phobetai depending on the text. Sixty-two times the word is translated as fear. Twenty-Three times it is translated as “be afraid.” Another five times it is translated as “be afraid of.” Only once is it translated as reverence, and that with respect to women.

Phobeō is the root of the English word, phobia and never has a connotation of reverence. The most literal meaning of the word is fear or be afraid of. In the first century, there was no legal recourse for women against domestic violence. There was nothing but moral constraint to prevent husbands from beating wives. Sadly, history has shown that moral constraints without legal clout prove inadequate in protecting women from wife beaters.

Out of 90 occurrences [of the word phobeō in the Greek text] with only one translated as reverence, one can only shake their head in wonder at the effort expended to justify the mistranslation.

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